Sunday, September 23, 2018

chit chat

“I thought I was going to lose my mind if I didn’t go to work”
Janhvi Kapoor, daughter of late superstar, Sridevi, and Boney Kapoor, talks about coping with grief and expectations


Rahul Gangwani  23.09.2018  TOI

Q. Pressure and expectations – currently these must be the most tossed around words around you. Right?

Yes, questions around these are asked. Like how do you feel with all these expectations being a star kid? ‘Pressure’ and ‘expectations’ float in my dreams as well. (Smiles) Main toh bindaas kaam kar rahi thi… abhi pata chala there’s no scope for silver. You’ve got to be gold in the first go. But I got this opportunity. That’s big deal for me. If this is a by-product of that chance, I’ll take it. I’ll work harder if I must the next time…if there’s a next time.

Q. Reportedly, your parents were taken aback when you told them you wanted to join the movies...

They thought I’d lead the lazy life. They were protective about me. Their attitude was that they’ve worked hard so I should have it easy. But I wanted a fulfilling experience from my life. I wanted to prove myself. My parents have made me so proud and happy. Now, I wanted to make them proud.

Q. You seem quite sorted for your age.

That’s another thing I’m particular about. I don’t want to take myself too seriously. There are people doing many more important things in life. I’m getting to do what I love – I’m lucky. I can’t act important. Kya ukhaad rahi hoon main yahan baith ke (what great work am I doing)?

Q. Please go on...

I like someone bringing me back to earth. During a film’s promotions, everyone makes you feel like you’re the most important person. They want to know what you’re eating, when you’re sleeping, what you’re thinking. But it’s all khokla (meaningless). It doesn’t mean anything. Your work is what matters. This just comes with the hype of the film. If it does well, maybe it’ll last longer. If not, then you need to go out and prove yourself again.

Q. Were you nervous when your mom attended the first day of your shoot?

I wasn’t nervous at all in front of Shashank (Khaitan) or the crew. But when Mom was on set, I was nervous. I was doing this to make her proud and didn’t want to give her any reason to say that you should’ve done it this way. She gave the first clap. She saw the take and was happy with it. She said a lot of wonderful things after seeing the rushes. The only advice she gave me was not to wear any make-up in the second half. She also asked me to put my chin down because sometimes it looks like I have a double chin.

Q. People on the set mention they saw two Janhvis during the shoot – before and after the unfortunate demise of your mother…

I guess I could understand the emotions in my character better. I had been through something emotional. It just gave me a new perspective. There’s a sense of responsibility now. I have my father, my sisters (Khushi and Anshula) and my brother (Arjun Kapoor) but there’s a sense of having to fend for myself. Because the way mom was, we never had to think for ourselves. She would think for us. I always knew someone was thinking of me. She did it more than a normal mother would. She was so hands-on.

Q. Are you emotionally settled now?

No. I haven’t got around the acceptance stage yet. It’s just that there hasn’t been time or I haven’t allowed myself the time to come to terms with everything. There’s a stage of denial that we’re all going through. I wanted to shoot the next day (after the cremation). But the shoot got cancelled. I was like, “No, I must go back, I need to be on the set.” I thought I was going to lose my mind if I didn’t do that.

Q. What are the things that you miss about her the most?

I’ve so many random memories of her. Every morning, we had this tradition. Dad, mom and I’d sit in the living room and discuss random things. Khushi would always be sleeping. Papa would bully mom and she would pull his leg... She’d force Papa to have around 10 juices.

I remember in our Chennai house, she’d play old AR Rahman songs. She’d place flowers all around the house. She’d go to Papa’s study and sit on his lap. She’d feed him. She’d make sure he ate well – things like prawn biryani and then she’d crib about his weight. She’d always be there to see off Khushi and me. She’d go to the fish market and buy fresh fish for us. I miss… these small things.

Q. Are things different at home now?

There’s a new family dynamic at home. We were always close to one another. But now we’re closer. Dad has been the mother in these last few months. He’s been so hands-on. It’s not just him, there’s a new family dynamic with Arjun bhaiya (Kapoor) and Anshula didi. They’ve been an immense source of strength and support. As a family unit, we’ve become much stronger. Even though we’re in a confused space, we’re protective of one another.



“ Dad has been the mother in these last few months. He’s been so hands-on. It’s not just him, there’s a new family dynamic with Arjun bhaiya (Kapoor) and Anshula didi

Main toh bindaas kaam kar rahi thi… abhi pata chala

There’s no scope for silver. You’ve got to be gold in the first go

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